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Category Archives: Lists

Time-Wasting Ideas for Writers

Friday, April 2, 2010

Fellow writers are invited to describe how they avoid writing; they may even display their writing-avoidance achievements right here on this page.  I’ll go first.  Pointless cross-stitching is, I’ve found, much better for this activity than TV-watching, floor-scrubbing, and mousing around on the web.  There’s the pseudo creativity angle, plus the fact that you’re making [...]

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Nouns That Can Only Be Plural

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

The idea for this list is courtesy of the inestimable Billy Frolick. Some nouns in English are always plural.  Can we add to this list? pants (also slacks, trousers, pantaloons, shorts, etc.) scissors pliers pajamas The standard explanation for this phenomenon is that these are things that essentially have two parts.  Yet we talk intelligibly [...]

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Two New Lists!!

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Actually, two new list ideas, each of which I have generously started.   ADJECTIVES THAT ONLY EVER MODIFY ONE THING tumescent wine-dark  (thanks and kudos, Jonathan Harnum) sopping (thanks and kudos, Billy Frolick) scudding       WORDS THAT ARE THEORETICALLY INDEPENDENT BUT ACTUALLY ONLY EVER USED WITH ONE SPECIFIC OTHER WORD trove  throes Please [...]

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Funny-Looking Words, part deux

Saturday, August 29, 2009

When I was a kid, I sometimes used to stare at words just to see what they could do. I remember more than once staring at the word “soon” until it sprouted extra Os and the imagined sound of the word was strange and hilarious. Then there’s mere repetition, which can polish the most ordinary [...]

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“Incredulous as it may sound…”

Thursday, July 23, 2009

was a hilarious line in Young Frankenstein.  Anyway, it was hilarious to members of the audience who recognized that the correct adjective in context was “incredible.”  Soon after the movie came out, though, I swear I noticed an uptick in the general misuse of “incredulous,” as though Mel Brooks had unwittingly (or, who knows, wittingly) [...]

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Machine-Translated Jokes!

Thursday, January 22, 2009

These, courtesy of Google Translation and http://hephaistos639.over-blog.com/article-26960987.html, are pretty fabulous, both when they work and when they don’t.  Please feel free to suggest additions, but be sure to include the original url.   – Un mec entre dans un bar : “bonjour, je voudrais un chwirzkitchuidrutec à la menthe” et le barman “Vous voulez un [...]

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Unintriguing Headlines

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Here’s a new list.  These must be substantiated.   Bullies May Get Kick Out of Seeing Others in Pain http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27592980/ Portuguese sausage sighted in North County http://www.nctimes.com/articles/2008/08/20/food/groch/z8756df8b2ffbd441882574ab0001abe5.txt      

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Most Intriguing Opening Paragraphs of Real News Stories Involving People Stuffing Things in Their Pants

Sunday, October 12, 2008

SWEETWATER, Tenn. – A woman has been charged with possession of burglary tools after police said a crowbar slipped out of her pants as she was lurking around a church. (AP, 1/28/08) LOS ANGELES — When the rare birds of paradise escaped from his suitcase and flew over the heads of U.S. Customs Agents at [...]

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Reviews for The Writing Class

Saturday, June 21, 2008

According to critics, I’ve written: A Sizzling Summer Beach Read: http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25280915/ [F]irst-rate satire…not even the mean-spirited sniper can find anything evil to say about the endearing Amy, whose quirky Web site (called “Go Away”) is a gold mine of literary nuggets:  http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/27/books/review/Crime-t.html?_r=1&ref=books&oref=slogin A Killer Murder Mystery: http://www.cleveland.com/entertainment/plaindealer/index.ssf?/base/entertainment-0/1214037020320080.xml&coll=2 Not Your Usual Murder Mystery: http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,23889208-5003424,00.html [A] black [...]

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Onionesque Headlines

Monday, February 11, 2008

This fabulous List suggested by Tom Hartley.  All entries are his, unless otherwise attributed.  As always, feel free to jump in.  9th Viewing of Return of the Jedi a Disappointment Haydn Threatens to Glut the Symphony Market Kierkegaard’s Latest Philosophical Musing Depresses No One Mark Russell to Apologize to Nation for Not Writing a Song [...]

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